Thursday, December 23, 2010

Day 3

I am going to warn you (mostly Husband) that this post is going to be on multiple topics. Rich does not like when I ramble, but when has that ever stopped me? Maybe if I segregate it in an orderly fashion he will be happier. We shall see.

First topic: Today is day 3 of no grains. I have been surprisingly good. I have not had any grains in the last 3 days and I have not curled up in a little ball and died. I had a coworker get very upset about the fact that I was doing this and actually raise her voice at me a little. She was not mean, more passionate about her love of whole grains. I agree with a certain person, that will remain nameless because they have given me shit about calling people out in my blog ;) . "You do not need grains. They taste delicious, but you do not need them."

I might regret saying this later.... but I feel surprisingly well. I have not had any tummy issues in the last 3 days. You might be thinking: Wow Bea (pronounced "B"), that is not much of a stretch. But it is. I have a lot of tummy issues. I discovered earlier this year that the reason I get so sick after drinking 2 beers is not because I am a light weight. (Yes, I know am a light weight but that is not why I get sick) I get sick because I have an intolerance to barley. No problem, there is always tequila.

Barley is a sneaky bastard. People throw barley flour in random things all the time. I have no idea why. I mean really... Who thinks: "You know what this bagel needs... Barley flour"? Einstein bagel, that's who.

Today seems to be going a lot smoother. The bread fairy must have taken today off. I have not found copious amounts of grain products at every turn. Not having it everywhere does make it easier not to eat it. {(Wow, that sentence has a lot of its in it. The knights that say "Ichy Ichy Kabang" would be cringing on the floor.) I totally did that on purpose, just for you babe. :) }

Second topic: Being a human takes a lot of work. Being a human girl takes even more work. I do not like all the work it takes to be a girl. You have to shave and straighten your hair and wear makeup and match. It is exhausting just to think about. I have better things to do with my time.

My mom tried to make me more of a girl but I have always been like this.
"Bea why don't you go play dolls with Sara."
"No thanks, I am going to go play capture the flag with Andy Booth while we shoot each other with paint balls instead".

I even had a cotillion. I wish I could find the picture of me in the big, white, floofy dress with my long white gloves. I look so not amused to be there.

Living in North Carolina takes even more work. You actually have to moisturize here. I grew up in Florida where there is enough water just hanging out in the air to moisturize your skin. I do not understand people who say: "but it’s a dry heat". Like that is a good thing? All that means is that you are walking around feeling like a prune most days.

I guess that is all I have for right now.


  1. Paleo crackers yay!

    +1 cup almond flour*
    +1 egg white
    +a little sea salt or other flavoring if you want

    Mix everything up (a fork works well for this) and roll it out super super thin in-between two pieces of parchment paper. Bake it at 350 for about 10-15 minutes, checking every 5 minutes. Don't forget to cut it into cracker-size squares, either before you put it in the oven or after the first 5 minutes.

    *I make my own almond flour with a heavy-duty coffee/spice grinder thingy (not the same one I use for coffee!). The trick is to freeze the almonds before you grind them, then do it quickly as possible in small batches, sifting each batch. You could also just get premade flour.

    You TOTALLY better find that cotillion photo. I want to see the floofiness!

  2. i love this post. i love your "rambling", so tell husband... well, i don't know what you should tell him. never mind. just tell him i said hello i suppose. haha. ;)

    i'm starting another whole 30 tomorrow. are you still doing okay w/your no grains?